Thursday, April 14, 2005

20 ways to know you are in Israel

1) There are cats everywhere
2) You want to go to the bank during the day, but it’s closed from 1pm and is not going to re-open, because it’s Wednesday.
3) Instant coffee does not mean soluble
4) Instant coffee is on the menu in coffee shops
5) Everyone tells you that you have to contact the Ministry of absorption as soon as you arrive, so you contact them and they say to you, ‘What are you doing here?’
6) You go on a hike and the tour guide starts without you.
7) The taxi driver says he will drive you for free if you go to the beach with him.
8) Humous is served with every meal.
9) Everyone speaks Hebrew around you, and when you speak Hebrew to them they answer you in English or Russian (Am I really that pale?).
10) No one can answer a direct question directly
11) Everyone that you meet invites you for Shabbat
12) Translations from Hebrew to English include genius such as ‘Buy genes here’
13) You can stand in the old city and hear church bells, the muezzin calling, and prayers at the kotel all at the same time.
14) Everyone thinks your cool because you are Australian and you ride a kangaroo to school
15) Everyone thinks your crazy to move here from Australia and says ‘to visit Australia that is my dream…you know there are a lot of Israeli’s there’
16) Everyone is wearing their mobile phones around their neck including geriatrics and beggars.
17) People wear socks with Naot
18) Everyone smells
19) What took you 15 mins to do in Sydney, took 6 hours, 25 pieces of paper, 8 signatures from different people and a lot of running around. Of course you have no idea what is written on the pieces of paper, but your signature is also on all of them.
20) Your street is named after someone who fought with their lives so you could walk down it, and it feels pretty awesome.


Blogger Benji Lovitt said...

Everyone smells????

6:01 AM  
Blogger gils said...

Yes might have a blocked nose!

3:07 AM  

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